Do most men and women realize that the wife will outlive the husband by several years? What should I do?
Yesterday my wife gave me the husband who is 57, she is 55, the grim statistics that she will probably outlive me by 5 to 10 years or more. She demanded that I start going over all the financial details and start giving her more control over our financies. Do you think I should let her take over our financial assets. She also reminded me that almost one third of men will have prostate problems and perhaps one quarter get prostrate cancer. I knew women lived longer then men, but I never believed by how much. I guess in the end women are indeed stronger then men. Help!
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No so anymore. Studies have shown now than women die from heart attacks at about the same rate as men.
Live life to the fullest!
Well, I think you should at least go over the finances… that way she will have a better understanding. I think everyone is diffrent… I dont think you have to much to worry about, enjoy the time you have with her now..
Make every moment count.
gosh, that sounds like that was a lovely conversation…..did she request you up your life insurance policy too. Actually, she’s right, and she should be involved with the finances….both of you should know what is going on in your financial life, who knows she could get hit by a bus crossing the street long before you croak………perhaps the two of you should start exercising and eating right as well….a checkup every year would be a good thing too
I think she should be a part of the financial planning, but not because she will outlive you. Nobody knows that. Nothing is carved in stone. I know plenty of widowers. She could also get heart disease, breast cancer, or ovarian cancer.
Maybe it’s just the way I’m reading the question, but she seems to be trying to guilt you into something by pointing out you may be dead before her. I would try to get to the bottom of that……
Most women panic like this when a close friend dies and they have been taken care of all their lives . . . and now what, where’s the money, life insurance policy, checkbook, etc. Give her a spreadsheet with all account numbers and contacts. Show her where all the important document are in case of an emergency. Stability and knowledge is what she wants . . . it’s scary to be given facts and then not know a darn thing about how you would pay for 5 – 10 years of your life.
No one has any guarantee on life. Make out your will and you decide who gets your shit after you’re gone.
Actually women do live about 6-7 years longer than men. My husband and I have been married 30 years…he is 7 years older than me and I am 50. I have not demanded to take over anything but he has made sure that I everything is left to me first in our will and after I die it will go to our children…we have talked about how things should be handled when ONE of us does go..it could happen either way! We know one of us will go first. We have talked about the house…etc. The checking accts. are in both names so I can continue to write checks and I at least know how to function and where things are…what accounts exist, etc. We BOTH want to be sure that the other has as smooth an existance as possible when the other is not here…we have been with one another a long time and it will be heart breaking for one of us one day to lose the other…it’s a loving thing to do what you can do to plan ahead a little.
Your should have some idea at 57 what you will use for money when you retire and where the money is coming from. I’m retired and my husband is semi retired and we have gone over our finances on more than one occasion together and with a financial planner. It’s not a good idea to go into retirement without both husband and wife knowing how much money they have to live on.
My wife and I are separated in ages by twenty years, I have turned all financial over to her, I want her to be able to take care of everything and not be in fear of losing the house or whatever. I have also written a will. The age thing never bothered me until a few weeks ago my best childhood friend suddenly died, and I am older than he was. It makes you realize that you need to have things in order before we leave this world.
Both parties should understand the finances. You need to explain to her your financial arrangements, and vice versa if she has her own finances. Either one of you could die suddenly – it happened to my father in law – and it is a nightmare trying to wade through paperwork. Because he always kept his finances private it turned out that when he died she was so much worse off since most accounts/investments were in his name only and we had to go through probate.
well what she saying is true to a point, an yes, while you still here, you should help, her get to learn the thing she need to know, i know most men dont want to find it the truth, but, after my dad pass,leaveing my mom, with 3 of us to care for, it was hard on her, she did not know where to start, ,,,but as i love my dad dearly, i also learn a leasion, from it, i , been working all my life , now to get my wife, on her way, for the future, ,,, for i dont want her to go threw what my mom did,
She sounds a little cold hearted about this. Take care of yourself and just take it day by day. None of us know when our time is going to be , if it is a natural death. But, yes, she needs to be involved in the financial aspects of your marriage. If she isn’t good with money, set it up so that her name is on your accounts but she can’t do anything without your permission. Have her as the person to take care of the finances if you become too sick to..
Imust say I think it is somewhat tactless of your wife to point this out to you. it is true that women often survive men, but it is not always the case, sometimes the wife dies first, and she shouldn’t absolutely count on outliving you. It would be a good idea if both of you understood your financial situation,b ut I see no reason for her to keep on harping on your eventual demise.
If you do not belive that females live longer then males, go on the many life expantancy calulators that are available free on the web. Usually the story will be the same, women outlive men by 7 or 8 years. Although a shock, you should not be embarrased by the weakness of men being male, but if you love your wife, try to reassure her that you will do everything possible to make sure that both you and your wife have a good retirement, and that if you go sooner you will provide for her, like you have done through out your life. As an example please read this,
Biologically, there is a clear superiority of women over men:
• Women live longer by at least seven years! In the animal kingdom, the female also lives longer than the male.
• Women are more resistant to infectious agents and even cancer!
• Women work longer hours during their lifetime than men. Women have less leisure time. • The infant mortality rate is less for girls than boys.
• In industrialized countries the greater longevity of women is an undisputed fact.
• Women are known to take better care of themselves, both physically and mentally.
• At any age, men are three times more likely to die of accidents, violence and cardiovascular diseases.
• Malignant cancer related to smoking and alcoholism occur more frequently in men.
layer of fat..
• Women are wealthier than men. The U.S. Treasury Department informs us that women die richer by outliving spouses and inheriting everything. • Girls mature, on the average, three years earlier than boys.
great and nice. so cool.
I have a traditional wedding ring because my fiance is a traditional type of person. I had wanted a moissanite, three stone oval white gold ring because I wanted him to save money and they’re more sparkly than diamonds and they’re laboratory developed.